Dealing with Discrimination in my school district ...

     It's been a while since my last blog post, and with good reason. Here's the basic timeline of events before I get into the nitty gritty of today's post.

Existing history:

Summer 2010 - Jacob was diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder.

Summer 2013 - Little Friends Center for Autism did a comprehensive evaluation of Jacob. During this evaluation, they stated that he seems to combine fantasy and reality, and that he has a fascination with guns and violence. They identified the fact that his ability to cope with frustrations is limited, and that he needs support in this area. They stated that it will be important to provide Jacob's educational team with extensive training on ASD in bright children in order for them to fully meet his educational, social and emotional needs. They stated that children like Jacob can be "foolers" in that their behavioral difficulties often appear to be willful and fully informed acts. However, with close examination, skill deficits more often than not underline negative behaviors. They also stated that Jacob tends to result to self-harm when overly stressed, and that he has the potential to develop severe emotional issues should he not be properly supported.

August 2013 - Jacob re-entered the public school setting after having been home schooled for a year.

October 2013 - Jacob was hospitalized for suicidal and homicidal ideation due to stress in the school environment.

February 2014 - Jacob was Hospitalized for suicidal and homicidal ideation due to stress in the school environment.

March 2014 - Parents and doctors requested therapy day school placement for Jacob. District denied request.

August 2014 - School began.

September 2014 - Jacob was Hospitalized for suicidal and homicidal ideation due to stress in the school environment.

September 2014 - District finally agrees to put Jacob in a self contained (special education) class in a different school.

August 19, 2015 - School started (Welcome to middle school .....)

August 28 - School called saying that Jacob was talking about hurting himself, broke his glasses, and was demanding that they allow him to call me. After speaking to his psychiatrist, she decided that he needed to stay home until an *appropriate* IEP was put in place.

September 3 - 2 1/2 hour long IEP meeting where nothing is resolved, but we agree to send him back to school on the 8th. We also agree to meet again on September 14th.

September 8 - Jacob returns to school.

September 9 - School nurse called. Jacob is complaining of an upset stomach, headache, and generally not feeling well. I spoke to him and could hear the stress in his voice. I agree to pick him up to prevent him from deteriorating.
                     - We receive an email from the district informing us that their attorney will be at the meeting with them on the 14th, and they need us to sign a 10 day notice waiver to allow her to attend.

September 10 - Jacob returns to school.

September 11 - School calls saying that Jacob only attended his first two classes and was talking about suicide again. This time they did a risk assessment, and he scored an 8 out of 9 for moderate risk. I let them know that I'm on my way and that I'm calling his psychiatrist. His psychiatrist says to take him to the ER to be evaluated. The ER evaluates him *4 hours* after we arrive. By this time, I have him completely calm and none of us feel like he's a harm to himself or others. We get to go home.

September 14 - 4 hour long IEP meeting where nothing is resolved yet. They don't seem to see the concern since he wasn't hospitalized this time. They ignore the history and say "But this is a new year and a new team. You have to give us a chance." We let them know that we can not knowingly put our child back into the same situation without safety points put in place. We agree to reassessments, but they've not told us how this will happen without him being in school. They *do* inform us that they can not and will not entertain the idea of access to an animal. Especially not the very well trained Emotional Support dog that we already have.

September 16 - We hire a lawyer.

September 25 - District tutor begins working with Jacob. She's only capable of getting him to work for 30 minutes at a time with her.

October 2 - Tutor quits.

October 5 - 2 hour long IEP meeting WITH lawyers where nothing gets resolved. We agree to meet on October 8th to review a charted out view of what the school can provide and what Jacob's needs are. We've now provided them with a letter from his psychiatrist stating that she's prescribing therapeutic day school placement, home bound instruction until such time as he's properly placed, and access to a therapy / support animal.

October 8 - 2 hour meeting where they provide *nothing* new, and we all agree that they can't provide the Crisis Intervention that Jacob *needs* which includes access to a furry animal. The District representative informs us that she has the District's recommendation, but that their lawyer has to discuss it with our lawyer.

Current situation and the true existence of discrimination:

   Jacob's psychiatrist has called him "Twice Exceptional, but so very Autistic" because of his verbal skills. He's incredibly intelligent, quite amazing, and has the ability to put things to words that flow through his mind. She also stated that this makes his Autism seem more invisible, but it's so very much there. Now, comparing this conversation with the mess we've seen so far from the district since Jacob's Autism diagnosis in 2010, it fits perfectly with their lack of desire to meet his needs where they actually ARE. They are willing to do the bare minimum, and make it seem like they are going above and beyond to do things that aren't really needed. No matter what the medical documentation says.

His doctor says that he *NEEDS* access to a therapy dog and a therapeutic day school. The District says "He doesn't present to US as a child that has these needs. We feel like we can adequately help him in his current setting." We say "But you didn't and couldn't. He's already been to the ER once this year because you couldn't meet his needs." They say "Oh. But he wasn't hospitalized, so it's really not as bad as you are saying." We point to the letter from his psychiatrist saying that another hospitalization is DETRIMENTAL to his mental health and won't do anything anyway since it's only geared toward adjusting his medication and his medication is already at the highest therapeutic dose that his body can handle. They say "Well, that's nice. But it's only a recommendation and we aren't required by law to follow a mere DOCTOR'S recommendation."

So, they've decided in their non-medical minds that they are more equipped to decide what my son needs. They've decided that since the school he's assigned to doesn't have animals on site and the teacher is unwilling to have an animal in her room, then they aren't able to meet this accommodation that they really don't feel like he needs. When I offered to bring our CERTIFIED and WELL TRAINED Emotional Support dog to Jacob and have them sit in the car for 5 minutes so that Jacob could go back to class, they decided that they felt like that would disrupt his day too much and is an inappropriate request on our part.

Time and again, the District has decided that Jacob doesn't really need the things we've said he does, and time and again it's resulted in him going to the ER for suicidal ideation. Time and again they've discriminated against him because his Autism is balanced by his giftedness. Time and again, they ask us to allow them another chance, and every single time, HE's the one who pays for it. It's so very frustrating to see that the school district doesn't recognize the pattern and they they continually ignore medical documentation in favor of their own pre-conceived ideas about Autism. Seeing their continued discrimination against him because he has above average intelligence and abilities is heart breaking. I want my son to be in a school that will give him the education he deserves with the support he needs, and will keep him SAFE. I just want my son to be SAFE at school. Is that too much to ask?